My husband, Sam, was diagnosed with testicular cancer in 2005. He went through chemo. He lost all his hair. He got white and puffy and tired. And when it was over, we were given the good news that he was cancer free.
We were already in the process of adoptiong from Korea when he was diagnosed. Our adoption was put on hold until he was in remission and then the agency encouraged us to change to domestic adoption because they knew Korea’s strict health guidelines would probably not allow us to adopt.
My husband said that adoption is about “re-direction,” following a new path despite what we originally planned. I meet so many folks who have been re-directed in their own adoption process for a variety of reasons: the country they were adopting from closed their program, the wait becomes longer than they anticipated, the birthmother changes her mind. Adoption, in some of the more painful moments, redirects us to a new path, a changed timeline, and a different child. We went from adopting internationally to a U.S. adoption.
Our daughter came along just a few months after Sam was in remission. Even though we had switched adoption programs, we assumed we’d have a long wait. Instead she arrived only a few months after my husband finished chemo. Our son, also adopted, came along almost four years later.
Since 2005, there has been happiness and joy. Many, many tears too. But oh, so much goodness.